Myths and Legends of the World

A straight man who accidently took a GAY friends dose of Nohomoicillin has suffered intense side effects of feeling like getting on his knees and sucking a cock or wanting to be fucked in the ass and watch reruns of Drama Queens or Oz. Doctors examining the man say that apparently the effects on straight men are just the opposite of gay men so that the drug cures gay men of their gay urges but when used in straight men it has the opposite effect on them and cause them to become absolutely gay. A Research scientist at Chimerex who declined to give his name said, "I guess it's back to the drawing board."  When we developed this drug we did not bother to test it on straight men because we felt there was no need to. Apparently like many drugs discovered that have different uses than originally intended like Viagra (which was originally developed as a heart drug but found to increase libido in men and women), as it is used by different types of patien...

1.  My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL  DONE   .   "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside.   I just finished cleaning."   2.  My mother taught me RELIGION .   "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."   3.  My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL .   "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"   4.  My father taught me LOGIC .   " Because I said so, that's why."   5.  My mother taught me MORE LOGIC  .   "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."   6.  My mother taught me FORESIGHT .   "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."   7.  My father taught me IRONY .   "Keep crying,  a nd I'll give you something to cry about."   8.  My mother taught me about the...

My cousin Tony had just come home from prison after doing a year and six months for Breaking and Entering charge. His mom was throwing a welcome home party. I was in charge of answering the door, when a skinhead dude shows up asking if Tony lived here. I said yes invited him in and told him to look for him in the living room. Tony was sitting next to his mom and his girlfriend. When the skinhead guy walked in the room everyone got quite. He walks over to Tony and says welcome home honey and plants this huge kiss right on his mouth. That crazy thing was Tony was kissing him back. They swapped spit for at least two minutes. When they finally separated lips Tony said Mom this is Alex my cell mate and boyfriend. He is really awesome Mom and I know you will come to love him. Aunt Lisa passed out, and fell off the couch. Tony’s girlfriend was in tears, screaming how could you do this to me. Tony told Alex let’s go up to my bedroom. Once they left everyone was freaking out. I yelled at the...

Chili Cook-Off If you can read this whole story without laughing, then there's no hope for you. I was crying by the end.  This is an actual account as relayed to paramedics at a chili cook-off in Texas. Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better. For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how true this is. Background Texans  have a Chili Cook-off multiple times  a year. This case. it was about the time Halloween comes around. It takes up a major portion of a parking lot at the San Antonio City Park. Judge #3 was a very inexperienced Chili taster named Frank, who was visiting from Springfield , IL Frank: 'Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was...